sketchez said
I can barely even see straight or walk straight at this point. I’m moving to florida soon but idk how I will mentally handle it.everything seems like a dream, derealization is bad.

Psy has no idea what it’s really like

Probably not.

My brother and I had a lot of resentment toward our mom too for not leaving earlier. But she’s crushed emotionally about it all and has tried to make things right so much that I just feel bad for her now. The thing is she tried to reach out for help and nobody would help her. The latest incident with me and my dad brought up police reports on him from way back when I was a kid. So I know my mom tried but no one helped. She was always the black sheep of her family too so they always took my dad’s side. She had nowhere to go and was on fixed income because she got injured working with my dad whose boss was my dad’s brother. She could have sued for so much but my dad fought against her and threatened her to protect his brother.

I mean, it’s good to let shit out and all, but I don’t really know if this is the best place to do it. Regardless of me doing it time and time again…

Lucem Ferre said
I mean, it’s good to let shit out and all, but I don’t really know if this is the best place to do it. Regardless of me doing it time and time again…

I was thinking the same thing. It’s kinda fucked up that there is even a thought of doubt in what we can post because some folks like to use it as ammo at us later. Check your pm.

YayYay said
My brother and I had a lot of resentment toward our mom too for not leaving earlier. But she’s crushed emotionally about it all and has tried to make things right so much that I just feel bad for her now. The thing is she tried to reach out for help and nobody would help her. The latest incident with me and my dad brought up police reports on him from way back when I was a kid. So I know my mom tried but no one helped. She was always the black sheep of her family too so they always took my dad’s side. She had nowhere to go and was on fixed income because she got injured working with my dad whose boss was my dad’s brother. She could have sued for so much but my dad fought against her and threatened her to protect his brother.

My mom is honestly the most codependent person on the planet. I’ve seen her single maybe 2 weeks total in my life. She’s been divorced 4 times and this current relationship is on the rocks depending on what day it is. She creates her own demise and then blames everyone else. I’m glad I looked at her situation at a younger age and realized I didnt want to be like her instead of copying her behavior. I have had 2 serious relationships in my life. One I’m in currently, going on 5 years. I’m independent enought that if I wanted to be single and life alone, I’d be just fine. I sorta use her as a lesson on how not to be.

It’s not just that, but… I just feel like it’s not healthy to have to be unloading stuff onto the internet like this, which I do all the time, just usually not anything too personal… like, maybe there is a much better place to be doing this at..

It’s like, I don’t know but just doesn’t feel.. healthy..

YayYay said

Lucem Ferre said
I wonder, should we be unloading this shit on here?

It’s all fam. I’m not telling you guys stuff the court doesn’t already know anyway. 

This applies in my situation as well.

SexyLette420 said

YayYay said
My brother and I had a lot of resentment toward our mom too for not leaving earlier. But she’s crushed emotionally about it all and has tried to make things right so much that I just feel bad for her now. The thing is she tried to reach out for help and nobody would help her. The latest incident with me and my dad brought up police reports on him from way back when I was a kid. So I know my mom tried but no one helped. She was always the black sheep of her family too so they always took my dad’s side. She had nowhere to go and was on fixed income because she got injured working with my dad whose boss was my dad’s brother. She could have sued for so much but my dad fought against her and threatened her to protect his brother.

My mom is honestly the most codependent person on the planet. I’ve seen her single maybe 2 weeks total in my life. She’s been divorced 4 times and this current relationship is on the rocks depending on what day it is. She creates her own demise and then blames everyone else. I’m glad I looked at her situation at a younger age and realized I didnt want to be like her instead of copying her behavior. I have had 2 serious relationships in my life. One I’m in currently, going on 5 years. I’m independent enought that if I wanted to be single and life alone, I’d be just fine. I sorta use her as a lesson on how not to be.

Sounds like the way my mom was. Always getting in abusive relationships, blaming everybody else, etc. My brother came from a different father and he was abusive too, he also died in a car crash. Then after her and my dad got divorced, she got in another abusive relationship with some new guy but it didn’t last long. Then she flipped out, wrote a bunch of bounced checks, and went to prison for half a year. All things considered I should be just as angry at her as my dad. But she’s getting old and learned her lesson. She only cares about trying to live right now thank God. I’m happy to see her that way even though my brother and i were put through so much hell that we didn’t have to go through. The difference is though she’s tried to make things right and has lost everything. So I’m happy for her and feel bad for her.

Maybe it’s not all good letting all this out but holding it inside doesn’t help either. I should probably start seeing a therapist though.

YayYay said
Maybe it’s not all good letting all this out but holding it inside doesn’t help either. I should probably start seeing a therapist though.

Fuck a therapist. I’m not going to pay someone to hear me talk. I’d rather use that money to buy a nice fat blunt and a big gulp haha

OCJ_Brendan said

Yayyay said

You don’t know how many times I’ve dreamed of hitting my dad like that. But I never could. He’s the only guy I freeze up around. I had my chance and I just couldn’t do it. He even gave me the green light asking me if I wanted to fight. Woulda been nice but I’m not gonna beat myself up over it. I’m a strong believer in what goes around comes around anyway. My brother and I fought a lot too but obviously now I realize why. But we both forgave each other and were cool before he passed away

Dude to be honest I was crying my eyes out when I did it…I couldn’t have done it if I tried…it just happened I was so mad and frustrated and sad…I just couldn’t take it anymore….I snapped…

 

@lucem-ferre I try to keep my shit on the DL.  We can switch to pms….sharing is caring…and it sounds like alot of ninjas on here need to share…

That sucks dude. I hit my brother and broke my hand when I was teenager. Shit’s still fucked up and never healed right.