scruffy said

SPOOKYtheFUNGI said    

[just scroll up and read the shit above]     

wow.    

Lol I can't scroll up no further....oh,  back a page....got ya now

I can't believe I got a "wow" outta ya! 

Much Juggalo Love

...them typos tho! Made the story that much fresher LLAL

Your welcome

I don't know what I exactly did tho...

All I did was post my experience of the Milenko and friends Tour. ..

Guess ill blame the magic of the Dark Carnival, gnome sayin

Merry f'kn axemas y'all! I'm back up in this bitch with another fresh ass heart warming story that will hopefully take you away from those damn Christmas blues,  and maybe defrost your nutbags and titty sacks too,  gnome sayin? So grab your hatchetman shaped gingerbread cookies,  a glass of adult faygnog and a fat cigar stuffed with the finest Xmas trees you can find and prepare to read a tale about the spirit of Christmas that only the dark carnival could provide!

Big Ballas 12-21-18

SPOOKY AND THE HATCHET FACTORY

Twas a cold ass December night, the neighbors are playing WWF on my ceiling, the snow is a-falling  and the holiday headaches are abundant...so I grab a beer and pack a bowl, pick up my phone and head over to faygoluvers to escape to the magical juggalo realm that I call home!  Per usual, I quickly scroll down to see what the recent threads in the forum are, but something told me to check out the latest news articles before I head into the forums. And what do I see,  icp is gonna have big ballas at psychopathic headquarters and do an unplugged style acoustic set....WTF! (FFF reference)

I sat there and read that article 2 more times...it was that uncomprehendable for me.  I have always thought it would be fresh to visit psychopathic headquarters and the lotus pod and this was a str8 up InYoFace opportunity for anyone who has ever had that thought atleast once in their life....but that acoustic set had me puzzled.  I just couldn't really fathom icp doing their songs acoustically and sitting down, it just didn't compute and left me with alot of questions. That part weighed heavy on me wanting to go up until I found out the tickets sold out hours prior. I just didn't want to witness the clowns embarrass themselves on that type of level, I guess. 

So basically once I decided I should hit this up it was too late,  and I was fine with that since I still wasn't sold on the cost for me to attend,  ie rental car,  gas, hotel,  150 for the ticket,  the loss of pay for calling off work for a day,  etc.  When they announced the second night I naturally assumed it would be the day after the first round of tickets sold and was even less enthusiastic because it was a fact that psy museum was gonna buy out everything the first night,  and made the trip even less tempting.  Come to find out its the day before the original date...WTF!

I figured off bat that there is no way they can give the original night ticket holders the bone like that, so I knew they were gonna hold back on some of the stuff and limit out other items,  and I was cool with that... Plus we get to be the "practice" run for the icp acoustic set,  which will make it that much better for the OG ballas. 

We got a week this time before the tickets went on sale and ballas wasn't looking like a possibility for atleast another week for me. I assumed the tickets would sell out quick again and concluded that imma miss out on this once in a life time event.  The sale day arrives and passes and no word of it selling out... WTF!

All next week I am nervous that any minute the will announce it sells out before my next check.  The week goes by and I get my check but I would still have to wait another week due to unexpected expenses with an ER visit and car troubles. That weekend I go out for Xmas dinner with my woman's uncle and he gives me an unexpected gift of 100 bucks.  Once I get home me and my woman start figuring out exact expenses and start to try and get a golden ticket. 

In the mix of the excitement I hit up drunkalo cuz I remembered he was going,  but couldn't remember what night,  so I text him if he is going to the Friday or Saturday show... His reply is Friday, why?...i tell him I'm bout to go that night too,  I'm currently figuring out rental car and hotel... Y'all know where you are staying yet?  He replies awhile later and says " the wife says we can scoop you up and get a two bed room,  if you want"...what a couple of trill ass homies! 

I cop my ticket and the anticipation begins. This has been the most exciting "time of the year" in the last 20 years for me and for that I was thankful.  I walked around work like my shit didn't stink up until that Friday...others were complaining about money woes and I'm over there cheesing cuz my money woes come attached with a once in a lifetime experience!....so fuck the back! (juggalo "standing in line" reference)

Anyways,  that Friday comes and in my normal sheepish juggalo ways I'm still not fully packed and mentally prepared for what's about to go down.  Just a lil after noon drunkalo has arrived! I grab my shit, say goodbye to the cat,  text the Mrs I'm out and run down stairs like its Xmas morning! The love energy these ninjas give off is unfuckwitable! We hit the road and the feeling that this shit is happening finally sets in....I can't believe this is happening!.....WTF!

..................

PART 2 coming Soon!

Part 3 of SPOOKY AND THE HATCHET FACTORY.

...

When we hop off the shuttle,  there was still a lil bit of daylight,  about 10 minutes later and it would of been dark.  We walked along the fence to the vehicle entrance and turn the corner and there it is!  A normal looking office/warehouse type building with trees cascading behind the building with two semi trailers.  One was plain looking and was sinking into the ground,  same thing with the other trailer,  except that one had a Shangri-la tour theme paint job. There was a white tent by the "entrance" they had us using, so I pop inside the tent and smoke a quick cig till the line died down.  The tent was nice and well light with a couple of folding chairs and a heater blowing unit sticking out from under one wall of the tent... The heater was never turned on the whole night,  but atleast we were out of the slight drizzle and cold ass wind. 

The pat down was thorough, but by some lil scrawny kid who never worked a bouncer job. As we get searched you cant help but notice the giant wall of merch behind 5 huge folding tables with a huge hatchetman ice sculpture directly in the middle....fresh! We then get ushered to the table on our left where two lovely and cheerful ladies took our name (will call) and gave us our wristband(plain red plastic band) and our fresh big ballas amulet(free gift). There was some Xmas psy music being played from where the acoustic stage will be with about 100 folding chairs in nicely put rows. Now it's time to peep the merch. 

The first shirts I see all go for 25 and are some weird colors of jokers cards...some kinda seemed like they were from the bang pow boom era since they used gold blue green and red color schemes.  The right side of the wall was a cluster fuck of 10 T-shirts from various recent tours and gatherings. Nothing really vintage or odd looking.  Around the corner they had more stuff. It had jerseys hanging for 65 bucks hats for 20, echoside and juggalo against humanity decks along with a box of mystery girls clothes with only the sizes written on them.  They did have some rare jerseys for sale and they were alot more, I don't remember how much.  They were two hallowicked jerseys auto graphed and two jerseys the clowns wore at a gathering event...like juggalo court I believe it was called.  They had a hatchetman holding a hammer and said dumbfuck on the back of one of them. 

They had two embroidered hoodies, white fearless fred and a Mr Rotten treats for 40 and the first 6 screenprint hoodies for 25 bucks. They had a plethora of disposable cameras that were getting snatched up like it was a beanie baby craze or something.  They had mystery grab bags too! 5 random dvds for 5 bucks,  10 random cds for 10 bucks and a 15 dollar box that came with a shirt, CD DVD and sticker...they sold that by size,  which was a surprisingly smart thing I didn't think psy would come up with,  gnome sayin.  

They had gathering charms and booklets from multiple years past with zippo lighters and various icp 8x8 flats behind a cage that was hard to look thru and had poor lighting. I grabbed 2 of each the CD and DVD packs, a camera,  the ballas event shirt and a jeckel bros shirt that was green blue and red.  We take a seat by the stage and open our grab bags to see if they were worth it.  The cds had alot of duplicates but were well worth the costs, since I got quite a bit I didnt have. The both my DVD packs were exactly the same,  but drunkalo got some different things than me,  so it was just my luck. 

After that it's time to venture! We walk past the merch booth were we had two routes,  up some metal factory stairs or go right, thru a door...we chose against the stairs and went right. The room we entered had 3 office desk, one in each corner, and filling cabinets in the other corner.  The walls were littered with old school flyers, posters,  blacklights posters,  icp tattoo flash art,  fan art and vehicle license plates.  One wall to your left as you walk in was filled with photos AKA The Wall Of Karma! You could of spent two hours in that room easily, trying to look at it all. 

Through the next door was a short hallway with bathrooms on your right and a staircase to your left. At the bottom of the stair case was a Xmas tree with a faygo bottle on top,  and mad ninjas were taking pics in front of it.  Down the shirt hallway was the infamous Lotus Pod! Hoodoo str8jacket and Tristan were in there listening to some beats and conversing with eachother about shit,  while ninjas chilled on comfy chairs and love seats blowing lots of Xmas trees! On the right was the mixboard/monitor with a window to the booth behind it. The walls on the left had some gold and platinum plaques along with canvas photos...one was of young Lyte😜. We chilled for a lil bit trying to absorb the energies of the lotus pod all while looking for secret tidbits of info on FFF!...and I succeeded!

After that we head up the stairs.  There was a chair at the top of the stairs and an office a lil past it (jumpsteadys office). We decided to go back towards our left and the first door on the right was the juggalo show livestreaming.  I made sure to not stop by yet cuz I would end up staying the whole time and miss out on exploring the rest of the hatchet factory. The canvas pictures that lined the staircase windows and walls were fresh as fuck! The stairwell had a dope ass red light up chandelier and the railings were wrapped in Xmas lights....the whole place had Xmas lights and Xmas trees. At the end of the hall was fork in the road,  the door on the right was Billy bills office. It had more plaques on the wall,  a broken window, ( prolly from throwing something lol), an old office table with a broken chair and a cabinet behind it. The other room had a round table with a TV playing icp theater and the walls had more plaques and one wall had a bunch of magazine covers of icp,  including that AP split face covers. 

Going back down the hall we peeped into jumpsteadys office,  he was in there chopping it with hella ninjas and had games laying out on his table. The hallway next to his office had a booth setup with cookies and faygo. Directly after that was the metal staircase that lead down to the merch and entrance area and past the stairs was the prop/costume room. It had a giant table in the middle with more games,  shelves of props from various tours and movies you could play with,  lots of masks everywhere and a taped off area with tons of costumes, some in plastic suit bags and some not.  That room was hella fucking fresh! After playing with the toys I went to find drunkalo since we seemed to have split up. 

We end up meeting back at the merch booth and talk about what we seen and experienced so far. I grab a 15 dollar mystery bag and we decide to go drop off our shit at the car. We go outside and just miss the shuttle,  so we chilled and talked with the Gatekeeper about nonsense till the next shuttle arrived. We were the only three waiting so we got to have a fresh cruise with a driver named Bootleg Chuck Noris!

We hop in and the driver is ultra friendly and talkative with a funny sounding accent.  Drunkalo pointed out that he has a cardboard sign that said "your driver today is chuck noris!" in Spanish.  So I ask if that his name is bootleg chuck noris and he tells me yes cuz its spelled with one "R" not two "R's" and pointed to the sign. We asked if he was a psy employee or just part of a company psy paid to shuttle us.  He said, he was good friend of rob Bruce,  in that funny accent and babbled on.  We asked if he gets paid well and said of course Joe and rob lookout for him,  like a family... I ask him if it's true that psy is hosting this event cuz they are about to move headquarters for one reason or another?...he quickly responded and during his reply he broke his accent and said some words normally, he was not expecting that question and he definitely knew the answer to it,  judging by his response....which I will keep those details between the 4 of us. Once we got to the parking lot we asked if he could wait for us and he did.  A few more ninjas hopped in while waiting for us. As we hopped back in I said,  thank you kindly for waiting bootleg chuck noris!  Everyone laughed cuz they didn't notice his sign until I said that and the ride back was soopa fresh... Bootleg chuck kept up the funny stories and got us back promptly and safely!

... 

Due to dinner break....part 4 coming soon. 

Part 4 of SPOOKY AND THE HATCHET FACTORY

........

By the time I got out of the shuttle bus I was fairly confident I have seen the driver before but the dark lighting didn't help me out.  After walking around the hatchet factory for a while and gathering Intel on who psy had "volunteering" for them, i concluded that bootleg chuck noris was 100 percent one of the creators of Morton's list....either tall Jess or the other guy.  And I'm sure it was a quest giving to him to speak in an accent and be Bootleg Chuck Noris! That's soopa fresh, especially for those who caught on to the lil tidbits of freshness that was going all on around us! Psy really pulled off a fresh ass event and all the lil "bootleg/floob" style things made it even more fresh!

So round two of the hatchet factory,  let's begin...well maybe after a quick smoke.  Me and drunkalo enter the tent and Mrs dmx ventures inside.  A ninja starts chopping it with us and before I could ask he tells us he is from "BAWSTON" exactly like a true Boston native would!  Then he broke into a fresh gathering story about how some native American juggalo strolled thru his camp towards the woods and a creek mumbling something.  He tried to stop the ninja before he fell into the creek.  The ninja was wasted and talking about scalping ninjas and whatnot.  I guess the ninja telling us the story said he left his friend he brought there with him (non juggalo) and when he came back both of them were in his tent still talking about scalping and whatnot... He said they talked all night!  And just like a true gathering story that's were it ends,  no moral to the story lol. 

We break free and go inside the hatchet factory. The guy at the door didn't pay us down, he saw our charm or wristband and passed us thru... We could have totally brought a phone back,  but there was volunteers in every room so it would of got confiscated easily...except the lotus pod,  it would of been easy to record in there,  just sayin. Anyways they finally had the icp home movies playing in front of the folding chairs for the concert.  I stayed and watched a lil bit of it while drunkalo ventured off.  The videos were something you kinda need to see the beginning cuz walking into the middle of a skit didn't do it justice...hopefully they will release it on DVD so we can really gather it's story lines and fresh wig flipping flava. 

I venture back to the lotus pod and find drunkalo there. A ninja was asking to touch Tristan's guitar and that's when we departed.  We go up to the juggalo show and find Mrs dmx there chilling inside the room,  but in the back. We chill and watch the show pretty much the rest of the night.  I ventured around a lil bit here and there when I went for a smoke break but mostly watched the juggalo show.  I did miss Mrs dmx getting on the juggalo show and winning a stuffed zombie cat with exposed ribs... And the shout-outs!

On one of my ventures I chilled in a recliner in front of the wall of karma and over heard a story that saddened me and pissed me off!  This couple who came from a couple states away put their stuff down to take a picture and had their box of merch taken from them... I think they said it was over 300 bucks in stuff.  I was fuckin heated and can't believe I heard this during my meditation in front of the wall of karma.  So I wished for that ninja who stole their shit to flip their car on their way home and made my way back to the juggalo show....like.... WTF!

The juggalo show ended at 9ish and we made our way down to the stage.  I snatched a 25 dollar carnival of carnage hoodie while drunkalo snagged us some seats.  As soon as I catch up drunkalo tells me to stick my hand out to my right,  ninjas are passing shit around. So I non chalantly reach backwards and pretend like I'm in the circle.  I pull my arm back and turn around and smile and the no js quickly states, no ninja here you go and passed me a fat joint.  Next thing you know I'm being passed shit from all directions, I totally fuck up rotation but they were full of Xmas cheer and didn't care.  The ninja asked where I'm from and I found out he was a Columbus ninja!  Them ninjas are the shit.  He had a huge bag of Xmas trees and was just str8 rolling joints and blunts and packing pipes while five things were already being passed around...he rolled the entire show! I asked if I could grab a 10 for the hotel later and he said no man but I got you, hold out your hand.  He dropped atleast an 8th into my hand of some crystally sticky dank and said Merry Christmas!  He made my jaw drop and said are you fucking serious? He smiled and said yes much love homie and gave a fist bump....much juggalo Love to that Columbus juggalo and his crew... Sorry I didn't grab your name,  I'm sure I'll see you again...and thanks for getting me completely ripped that night... Fuck juggalos are awesome!

The stage had two throne like chairs with a dj booth between them in the back of the stage, with a high chair on each side of the stage and a microphone behind the throne on the right side.  Rude boy used that microphone which was behind the throne violent J sat in and razor ray was on shaggy side playing guitar.  Carlito on the tables and I'm not sure who the other guitarist was. They talked about being nervous and was unsure on how we are gonna feel about it.  They started off with "3 rings" and holy fuck was it different!  It took like 30 seconds for my ears to adjust to it but once I got in sync with it, I had a smile on my face bigger than the Grinch!

I know they were sweating the reaction at the end of the first song and they were blown away from how loud the crowd erupted once it ended.  They even said they couldn't believe we liked it that much and from that point on they had their confidence and str8 up murdered shit the whole night. At one point shaggy was talking about how he is glad we like this style of live performance cuz he gets to sit and not do shit. I blurted out loudly "that means they can rock us when their 80 and in their wheelchair,  and everyone around laughed...about 30 seconds later vj was rambling on about doing live shows and stated exactly what I said "so hopefully when we are 80 and in wheelchairs we can still rock the stage for yall" and then pointed my way and said "yeah we hear y'all mutha fuckas...much love ninja" and carried on with his story.  Fuckin fresh!  I added to his on stage confidence and made the energy even better.  

The rude boy was a fresh ass part of the set!  I'm not even joking,  even tho he had some laughable moments.  He even said it on the juggalo show that he does not have a good voice to be doing back up vocals,  but it worked extremely well to the magic of the performance. If the set was "unplugged" 100 percent professionally, it would have been horrible.  I think having rude boy up there with razor ray and a psy dj made it floobish,  and I wouldn't want it any other way....fuck a professional back up singer.

At first he was nervous as fuck,  you could see him looking around and being afraid of hearing his voice in front of the crowd but once he saw that we were feeling it he stopped being worried.  During the song "we belong" he did alot of vocals.  He knew pretty much all the lyrics and even closed his eyes and sang his ass off to that song.  You can tell he really feels that song and it really showed in his vocals cuz he sounded angelic... He made it rain diamonds during that song and after that he was hyped as fuck up there.  

Icp sat during most the set,  throwing water bottles, Gatorade with the tables torn off and red bull cans.  I did hear that they ran outta faygo before icp came on,  so the running joke for us was "where's the faygo"...lol....WTF!....LMAO.  I also stated that it's official I've seen violent J throw redbull instead of faygo,  they totally sold out and are now sponsored by redbull and moving the headquarters  to a redbull packaging factory!...purely speculation tho!

They all talked on stage seamlessly.  The stories were mostly things I've heard before or heard about.  But there was some things I've never heard as well....overall the show blew my wig all the way back to my home state and left me leaving with a fresh feeling of satisfaction for everything everyone did for me to make this event so damn fresh...and possible!!!

At the end violent J hopped off the stage into the crowd during "if I was a serial killer" at the part where they say "I wanna hold up my hatchet". I put my hatchet up and he made his way thru the crowd towards me giving dap to everyone en route till he gave me dap and then threw up his hatchet and finished off the song.  Soo fresh!

Once the song ended people bum rushed them for autographs and what not,  while the rest filed out the door.  We decided to grab a smoke in the tent so we hopefully don't have to wait in a long line for the shuttle.  It worked out perfectly.  We stood in line for maybe 7 minutes.  As we were standing the psy employees were all leaving out too.  One car comes by the line a yells " I got room for two more to your car". It was wowachick helping ninjas out! Much juggalo Love for all she did for that event,  your work paid off!...she said she will be back to shuttle more and to be one the lookout....so dope that we have such great ninjas in this community.

We wait a lil longer and the next shuttle fills up. We are the first 3 in line for the next shuttle bus when a honda crv or Toyota 4 runner pulls up and says I got room for 4 to the parking lot, we hop in and shout "room for one more" no one bites. I open the door and the interior lights come on and who is it? None other than the OG himself Jumpsteady! I sat shotgun with jumpsteady in his own personal vehicle! Such a humble ninja! We had an amazing convo back. He was very curious about the acoustic set in particular. He said that it was all Joe's idea and rob thought it just wouldn't work right. I told him I felt the same way and mostly came to say I been to the lotus pod and headquarters, but after they played the first song I was blown away and happy as fuck they did that type of show! He totally made it seem like its a once in a lifetime event and I'll be glad if that rings true! I also hope they recorded the 2nd nights performance, that way they keep it a one time deal that can only be "new experience" to someone via DVD. 

....

I'll wrap things up there for now.  I've spent over 8 hours typing this so far. I've got the ending of my ballas experience to finish ie the after party and the meet-up massacre that happened!...Bonus "parts" coming soon!

Merry  F'kn Axemas yall!